The agonizing wait

taras gayein hain aankhen tere deedar ke liye

kabhi to humpe ye raham kar...

...ke tu aaye aur hamari aarzoo poori ho

chhota hi sahi, ghadi bhar ke liye to yeh khushi ho!

Words are overrated

Hamari khamoshi ko woh samajhte hain ghuroor...

Darasal sharmindagi ne kiya hamein majboor...

Arrey woh naadaan kya jaanein...

...ki jahaan ek lafz se kaam chal jaaye,

wahan do kyon?

A couplet

Intezaar tha jiska shiddat se...

Tammanna thi jiski muddat se...

Woh hamesha ird gird hi tha...

Shaayad hamaare parakh ka kasoor tha...

Woh hamara ban kar bhi...

Hamara na ban saka...

Incredibly Indian

Dear God,

It is anybody’s guess now that our shameless media thrives on controversy (alone). The success of the recent F1 event was not devoid of its share of controversies. While a significantly educated and ‘aware’ section of the country celebrated the success, our Media toasted to it with a generous dash of controversy.

Yet again clowns from two of the most powerful parties were pitted against each other. I say clowns because neither had, I am positive, any clue of what the nation was witnessing, leave alone the benefits of this new wave of sport.

So, at the epicenter of the discussion was “Are we F1 ready?” and “What good does the sport do for our country?” One-time Sports Minister and compulsively arrogant prick enlightened viewers on the abject poverty our country is dealing with. His wisdom was that the new sport was getting undue attention, infrastructure and investment which could have been diverted to the BPL segment. An echo also added that F1 is not our culture.

Really? Either we are starved of thoughts or simply unwelcoming to change. Let me remind the aforementioned arrogant prick that CWG and 2G also ate into the tax payer’s money and did nothing to contribute to his concern. Also, do not forget the Bhopal tragedy. His Govt. has done precious little towards that, 25 years on.

Don’t you talk about culture! Cricket didn’t belong here, Denim was unheard of. But if we as a people embraced them over time, who are you to comment on culture?

Someone is missing the point. I can’t see why a new sport fetching us revenue (when we need it most) should not be encouraged. Incredible India can certainly do with a boost to its Tourism industry. Who cares! Plaguing issues like poverty, rise in prices, money swindled will remain matters of convenience.

Angry kya?

Dear God,

Allow me to introduce myself as the Burger. Briefly, I am a fillet engulfed by two spongy, albeit overbearing buns. That I am customized to suit the palettes of herbivores and carnivores is not part of the agenda.

Today I am annoyed and you will know why during this sojourn.

From time immemorial, I have been subjected to corruption in every walk of life, so much so that attempts to effect simple changes often raised quite a few eyebrows – “Live with it”!!

Along came a quartet claiming to be the conscience keepers of this great Nation. The Head Honcho threatened to fast at the drop of a hat. The resultant feed was an overdose of running jokes on the net. Sample this:

Amma: Go out and play

HH: No I will fast

Teacher: Kneel down

HH: No I will fast

Doctor: Breathe in and breathe out

HH: No I will fast

So you see, he slipped into ‘fasts’ for this and for that. Though not as inconsistent as M. Night Shyamalan’s produce, the only variation to his blackmailing was a recent “Maun vrat”. For a while, his methodologies prompted the quasi-sympathizers and pseudo-intellectuals to debate and provide entertainment on national television. I am not dwelling into the buffoonery contributed to this by the remnant members of that quartet. I was confused at this state – to support the methodology or not. Of course, I completely believed that the disease had to be eradicated but the methodology did not seem to (rightly put by a fellow blogger) do too much about the symptoms.

Nonetheless, the Government budged, not because it wanted to sanction his demands but because it feels pathetic to let a frail septuagenarian and his minions openly proclaim that the Govt. can’t cut the mustard. Of course, the Govt. did not let him have it easy. It employed jokers to comment on the quartet’s integrity from time to time. In due course, allegations were leveled against every member of the quartet. From commenting on plebiscites, first class free air travel, tax evasions to corruption from ‘head to toe’, the jokers ensured that the job was well done.

The media in the meantime, lapped onto every moment of this charade like an opportunity. Typical of a mad dog let loose, the media hounded the quartet, provoked the Govt., impaneled elite facades and provided comic relief to the nation. In keeping with tradition, inflammable headlines and by-the-second breaking news ensured space for competition.

Where are we today? Accusations and counter-accusations are in full force. With no news on the actual and core agenda item, no good news is in sight. The Quartet promises yet another fast, the Govt. continues to do its best to be counter-productive and the shameless Indian media continues to provide a reason to escape Mom’s pet operas.

I, the Govt’s dear and oft-abused rant, the aam-aadmi am in a pitiable state.

Here’s what I look like today. I am the indifferent Indian!

Dichotomy II

Dear God,

I can't keep the house thanks to the ever sky-rocketing interest rates. What started as a negligible 7.5% in 2004 has now touched 16%. Pundits forecast at least a couple of revisions more by the turn of this year. For the record, RBI has hiked rates 12 times times this year, not a record our country ought to be proud of. Who would have thought that I, with a home loan, would be a victim of uncontrollable inflation.

Anyway, I put my house up on sale.

But....this is amazing coincidence: Just when I initiated the advertisement, the Telangana crisis raised its ugly head. Real estate as it were, had already reached an all-time low. The crisis has ensured that there is no hope for individuals like me. Prospects today ask for rates that are pitiable and certainly not worth discussing.

So there it is, I can't keep the house, I can't sell it!

I am choking......help me God....

Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara (Hindi/2011)

Dear God,

Yes, I admit I said that the aforesaid movie is at best a travel guide. A friend remarked that he liked the movie and that it reminded him of Dil chahta hai. Oh! Because it had three friends and three chicks too....”no way, Jose!” methinks.

Anyway, there is a part of the movie that strikingly stands out - a distinct parallel that the story draws on. And I figured that watching bits of the movie on second run.

Three friends undertake a trip agreeing to venture into a sport they had hitherto resisted by choice or fear. So:

1. Farhaan’s character is afraid of flight. His thoughts are profound and deep. He doesn’t let himself soar high. Deep diving and exploring world below complements his thoughts and character.

2. In contrast, Hrithik’s character is afraid of the deep. He has soared high all his life. And so he finds flight exciting and more comfortable.

3. Abhay’s character seals it with fear of what chases him on the ground. He is forever running from reality, sometimes accepting destiny when it presents itself in especially terrifying times.

The parallel listed above, I thought, summed up the movie. Beautiful, indeed. All others just revolved around this. The chicks, the locales, the rifts etc were just there to, well, be there. Now you know, barring 1-2-3, the movie remains a travel guide.

Dichotomy....

Dear God,

I hate going to the Salon's but also hate growing hair....

How I dispose the adipose...

Dear God,

It took me a while to accept that I was obese (Type 1) on the BMI. Lots of literature, crash diets and extensive cycling sessions later, I realized none of it was really doing any good.

Top that with opinions from all quarters. After all they come free. So, a "Why don't you try Atkins?"or "You should have the Kelloggs breakfast" etc was routine.

By serendipity (well, almost), I discovered the one component of my diet that was causing the most harm - Rice. I had to get rid of it. Tough decision, especially given that it is a South Indian staple.

Strangely, it wasn't as difficult. I woke up one morning about six months ago and asked for all rice-based foods to be excluded from the diet. That done, I now had to focus on a strict regimen. A few things that really work for me - Eat a solid breakfast and eat it like you'd not have another meal for the rest of the day. So, my breakfast is laid out on a royal platter. About 10 rotis, a bowl of mashed potato, leafy vegetables' curry (or any other without oil), tomato or lemon juice (salted only) summed up the first meal of the day.

The other principle that works wonders is to have multiple meals in a day, ensures that you never go hungry. I carry green salad to supplement a healthy "between-meals" meal. I eat almost 6 times a day after that heavy breakfast.

I'd strongly recommend that those initiated into weight control should promptly identify and accept the following:

1. Obesity/overweight and

2. Contain eating habits before embarking on physical training

Trust me, half the battle is already won.

Now on the exercising bit - start off with walking (brisk 45m - 60m). The trick here is not the time. I figured a slight modification to the traditional formula T = D/S as under:

C = D/S

where C - calories burned

D - distance covered (by a stretch)

S - speed

So the faster I walk, greater is the distance covered in less time. That is the key. So you could cover 4 kms in 45m or 6+ kms in the same time. You know what to pick.

Over a period of time, I graduated to short spurts of jogging. Today, I jog for 8 kms with very short walks interspersed.

I also kept the cycling alive - Rain, cold or shine. I cycle to office everyday. That, while cutting the following out:

1. Elevator/lift

2. Alcohol

3. Rice

4. Non-vegetarian food

5. Junk food

6. Aerated drinks

7. Chocolate and all confections thereof

Once in a rare while, I do spoil myself though, I admit.

Tips:

1. Set a realistic target - "I will lose _kgs a month to achieve _ by the month of _".

2. Celebrate - "I will treat myself to a Beef steak and Beer if target is achieved."

3. Stay committed. You want good news, make it!

I am not saying what I clock today. I have never believed in results. The efforts should show. I have a long way to go, but the efforts have begun to show and I already feel good.

More later...

Coming back to life

Dear God,

This time it is not lethargy, not lack of content or thoughts. I have just not been able to get anything up here.

Quite a few folks have been inquiring, some sounding worried about the long overdue precis.

Anyway, so I am going to make an honest attempt to resurrect this space and keep it resplendent.

In recent times, I realized that my handwriting (that I was so good at, years ago) had deteriorated to despicable levels. Perfect! the timing couldn't have been better, I thought. I could pen my thoughts on paper and then convert them to this space.

I hope that revives my strokes while keeping this space engaged.

So help me God.